


Wild Blood

by RadioactivePaws



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: But Not Much, F/F, Fluff, but they also deal with problems and work through things, character tags will be added as i go too probably, domestic bella and alice, just wanna write them being dumb and cute, lycan!Bella, other ships might be added but they're the focus, some drama and angst for the storyline
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-07-28 12:58:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 20,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16242101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RadioactivePaws/pseuds/RadioactivePaws
Summary: Edward leaves and convinces the others to leave as well while Bella is back in Forks trying to find her way again. She discovers something about herself, an old family secret, as well as how her feelings have changed. Alice returns after Bella's future goes a little fuzzy and they discover the truth of things together.Basically it's a Bella and Alice get together after Edward leaves in New Moon. But with Lycan!Bella and literally the opposite of a slow burn between them.





	1. Awakening

**Author's Note:**

> So I haven't written in a little while and this is the first 1st person view fic I've written in years so hopefully you all like it.
> 
> To get a picture of what Bella looks like when she changes, just look up the Underworld Lycans and add some more fur to them and a tail.

“Do you know what I see, Bella? What I know to be absolutely true?” Alice’s voice called to me as it always did, soft and quiet.

The candles in her room flickered, soothing me as they seemed to reflect off of her skin from where we sat on her bed. This wasn’t real, couldn’t be real, and yet my mind was replaying a memory wrapped within a dream.

“What is it?” My answering prompt was always the same, always whispered like my voice would cause her to shatter.

“You’ll be with us, Bella. For a very long time.” This was spoken right into my ear, her voice so light it could have been a bell and yet to me it was like a gunshot. 

She was trying to comfort me, to warn me, or something in between. No matter what, I knew what came next.

The candles smoked, the haven of her room dissolved and so did she. I was left in the darkness, the cold, screaming until life dragged me back into it. 

That last shout of her name stuck in my throat as I opened my eyes to Charlie’s worried face, his gaze tracking over me until I gave a shaky half smile. 

“I’m ok.” We both knew it was a lie. 

This was the seventh day in a row he’d helped me wake up from nightmares. A full week since my life fell apart, since they all left me. Pain shot through my chest as I realized, all consuming and now an old friend. My smile must have turned to a grimace because Charlie was suddenly standing with his arms crossed tight against his chest. 

“Are you sure you’re ready to go back to school?” I’d spent the week at home, after the trauma and a fever that had spiked the first night and into the next few days. Charlie was willing to give me more, something I was tempted to take him up on, but I knew I needed to try to. I had to at least seem like my heart was still beating in a body that now feels so hollow. 

“Yes. I can’t just keep skipping, dad. I’ll be fine.” Another lie, something we were both growing used to accepting in the face of this. 

He stood, watching me for a moment more before finally nodding his agreement. I knew Charlie was happy I was trying but I also knew how much he understood what it was going to take from me. What it could do to me to have to go back where I first saw them and where I saw them everyday.

After he left the room, I went to the computer to do what I had done every morning since they left. 

I wrote to Alice.

> Alice,
> 
> Everything feels wrong. The fever I mentioned passed but I feel off, like something changed. 
> 
> Maybe it did, maybe you were all keeping me together more than I even realized. 
> 
> I’m going back to school today. Hopefully it won’t be too bad but I’m still not sure how I can handle not seeing you there. Not seeing you all. 
> 
> Maybe I’m just too far gone to really notice.
> 
> Bella

Short, as usual, and to the heart of the matter. I knew if Alice read them, if she knew the truth, she would come back to me. No matter what Edward had said to get them to go, I knew she would come back.

She had to.

It wasn’t Edward that I longed for. I miss him, just as I missed them all, but the anger and hurt outweighs anything else. It wasn’t until I whispered her name into the dark the second night that I realized just how broken my heart was.

For her. Over her. Always her. 

I loved Edward, I always would, but there was something about his charm and the way he was my first anything that made me cling to him. I loved him as I loved Jasper, as I loved Emmet and Rosalie, as I loved Carlisle and Esme.

I loved Alice in a way that eclipsed the sun. I needed her, craved her, everything in me cried out in pain each moment I realized I didn’t know if I would see her again.

Overkill? Probably, but I was never one to do any emotion half assed. 

I think it was part of why Edward did what he did with such cruel intensity. He could feel it, he could sense I would start moving away from him.

So for my physical safety, and the safety of his own heart, he decided to break mine. 

I wonder if she really knew what he had done. She had left already when he spoke to me, taken off to Alaska to help Jasper with his pain, and Edward knows how to find ways to trip up her visions. 

With a sigh, I pushed away from the desk and went to get dressed, looking for actual clothes to wear instead of the oversized shorts and shirt I’d been wearing for a week. 

“Be careful today, Bella.” Charlie’s voice rang out from downstairs as she set off for work. “It’s the first night of the full moon. Even people in small towns like this can go a little crazy for those three days.”

He meant me. I knew it, he knew it, anyone within hearing range knew it. Still, it was nice to hear his worry and I knew the cases he was working on lately were hitting him a little hard. Kids going missing in the city, a body found in the forest just outside town that seems to have been ripped apart. It reminded him of the things that happened when I first moved here, of the things that we all thought were over.

Maybe it would never be over. Not really.

Again, I was being over dramatic but really, I think I had the right to be a little intense these days.

The drive hurt more than I thought it would. I’d grown used to getting rides from Edward or Alice when he was hunting, my old truck only having to haul me back and forth on occasion, and today it sounded even louder than ever before.

Pulling into my spot didn’t help much. My friends stared at me as if they hadn’t seen me in years, eyes full of pity and careful curiosity. I waved hello as I headed inside but didn’t stay to chat.

The day passed in a blur of attempted talks by Mike and Jessica, quiet concern from Angela and Eric, and the droning of each class helping to keep me distracted from the fact that there was a void where the Cullens usually sat.

Once the last bell rang, I headed home as quickly as I could. I wanted to sleep, anything that meant not having to deal with this kind of existence. 

Charlie was still out and I was thankful he wasn’t home to see me cry over a bowl of cereal I called dinner. After I ate what I could stomach, I went upstairs to lay in bed, to watch the clouds go by as I imagined what it would be like if they were still here.

I watched out the window as if I expected Alice to jump up any moment, smiling and talking as if she hadn’t vanished out of my life. The clouds moved, the sky darkened and I dozed off with tears still drying on my face.

I don’t know what happened that night but something just hit. The moon rose and I convulsed, my entire body roaring with a pain I don’t think I could ever describe. If the vampire venom felt like fire running through my veins, this was almost like every bone in my body broke at once. While it only lasted a few minutes, maybe less, I thought the entire night had passed when I finally regained myself and stood.

I felt strange, as if my body has a mind of its own, and my steps were drunken, woozy as I ran downstairs, out the door and into the trees. 

Everything was brighter, more vibrant, and I could hear the way the leaves moved with each brush of wind. I could smell the animals and my mouth watered, a reaction that normally would have given me pause but I was lost to it all. All I could do was run.

I stopped when I found water, the flow of the creek slowing my movements as I realized how thirsty I really was. Then, in the water as I moved down to drink, I finally saw what I’d become.

A wolf looked back up at me. A strange, very not wolfish wolf. My face had changed, a short muzzle overtaking my jaw and pointed ears off the sides of my skull. As I tilted my head, the wolf in the reflection followed the same path. Black eyes with a ring of light, a ring of moonlight, blinked back at me as I pondered what exactly this meant.

I should have been afraid as I examined hands that had grown larger, covered in a short black hair and tipped with nails and pads like a dogs paw, but they were still my hands. My arms were longer as well as my legs, though those were twisted and canine, ending in feet that were exactly like large wolf paws.

I should have panicked as I felt a tail move behind me, at how my entire body was covered in short brown and black fur, but I just felt free. Everything finally felt right.

All those years of wondering why I didn’t feel right, why I felt as though I could never fully fit in with any crowd I belonged to. Why the only time I ever felt like myself was when I was surrounded by vampires, by something so otherworldly. Of course I belonged in their world, I was always meant to be part of it.

While that part of me rejoiced, my heart caught up with my mind and I felt the cold sorrow creep into me once again. They weren’t here to witness my growth, to understand my excitement. I wouldn’t ever be a vampire but now I could still be with them, be safer around them, and they weren’t here to see it.

A pained howl ripped from my chest and every animal near my startled at the sound, a loud cacophony accompanying my anguish.

Instead of wallowing, I fell to all fours this time and let the instincts drive me again. I let myself go, running into the forest without any destination in mind. It wasn’t until I stumbled up into the empty Cullen house that I realized what a mistake that was.

Of course my instincts would carry me home.

Ignoring the hunger that clawed at my belly and the ache in my legs to run back into the trees, I climbed the stairs and went into the one room I knew could soothe me. Curled up in Alice’s bed, I breathed in her lingering scent and felt the intense pang of loneliness her absence caused. This was different, more intense than usual, and every bit of my being cried out for me to go find her. To run until my legs gave out just so I could try to scent her.

But my soul was weary and I gave into the need to sleep the pain away.

I woke to the sun rising, the strange sensation of my body shifting back to human startling me awake just in time for me to hear my phone ring.

“Hello?” My voice sounded strange, deeper and with a slight gravel that hadn’t been there before. As I sat up, I realized I’d grown as well. I had to be at least six foot now instead of the five foot four I was used to.

“Bella? Did I wake you up? I just wanted to check in since I didn’t get a chance to head home last night.” Charlie sounded guilty, almost a little frantic. “I didn’t want to leave you alone but I got a call and couldn’t make it back and when I called you didn’t pick up, I figured you were asleep since it was so late.”

“Dad!” I cut his rambling off, feeling that familiar tug in my heart that happened when he fussed over me. “I’m fine. I actually stayed over at Angela’s, we were studying for a test and I passed out on her couch. Sorry I didn’t answer your call but I didn’t see it till now but I’m fine. Don’t worry about me, I’ll just see you tonight.”

I couldn’t tell Charlie. Not yet, not before I figured this out myself.

“Oh,” The pleased surprise in his voice hurt a little, I didn’t want to lie to him like this. “Well that’s good, Bells. I’m not sure when I’ll be home but I’ll call after you get out of school. Maybe you should stay over again if she doesn’t mind.”

“Sure, Dad, I’ll let you know.” And just like that, I had an alibi for tonight and a way to ease Charlie’s worries.

I decided to raid Alice’s closet, to see what she left, but it seemed as if most of her clothes were gone. Either she packed them or Esme had taken her things with the family. Nothing I could find would fit anyway, her frame had been a little smaller than me before this growth spurt but now her clothes seemed so tiny. Instead, I found a small black ribbon left on her desk, probably left over from one of her designs, and tied it around my wrist.

Searching the other rooms didn’t provide much either but I eventually found a large flannel shirt that could only have belonged to Emmett and a pair of jeans that were too short for my legs. I ripped the bottoms off to make shorts, just happy that the waist area fit fine, and realized belatedly these must have been from Jasper’s closet. Hopefully he wouldn’t mind that I’d stolen them.

I took a moment to look at myself in the mirror on my way out of the house, this time actually shocked at what my reflection showed me.

My guess of my height must have been correct as I took up most of the long mirror by the door, my arms and legs suddenly showing an amount of muscle that would have taken forever for me to get. While my face hadn’t really changed, I noticed that my hair seems healthier and my eyes brighter, that circle of light I’d noticed in the woods shimmering around my pupils if I looked a little harder at myself.

I groaned as I realized a shopping trip would be needed to fix my wardrobe. Then the groan turned to a whine as the sudden sharp realization I wouldn’t be able to go with Alice slammed into me once more.

As I left the house, I realized I had no ride home. The walk was long and I didn’t think I would make it in time for school. Then I remembered that I wasn’t exactly human. I took a deep breath, pointed myself towards home, and started to run.

My speed wasn’t the same as it was changed but this was good enough. My legs felt free, the air cooling my heated skin and my feet easily taking me home even without shoes. Halfway home I ripped the sleeves from the shirt to keep the heat down and belatedly realized I’d ruined something of Emmet’s as well. I knew he wouldn’t mind.

I didn’t have time to do much at home other than to put on some shoes, I had to steal some of Charlie’s sneakers since mine didn’t really fit anymore, and to grab my truck.

This drive was even louder than before, the roar of the engine causing me to flinch before it settled down. On the way I tried to think of a way to explain these changes. By the time I parked, the only plan I had was to walk with a slouch and hope no one commented on my wardrobe.

This plan failed the moment I got out of the truck.

All eyes were on me as I walked to the door with my head down. I tried to ignore them, making sure I looked nowhere but my shoes, but it was hard not to hear the whispers now. I could hear so much more and I wasn’t sure I liked it in this instance.

I needed a distraction, as well as information, so I headed to the library. The school didn’t have much but I figured it was the only place I had for a quick attempt before class. As expected, I didn’t find much beyond some stories of the Quileute tribe I’d already read and a few books on folklore. Nothing to explain why I’d suddenly become a teen werewolf.

I spent the day listening to the whispers, the rumors, the questions that came from every inch of the school. No one asked me directly, only Angela spoke to me like everything was fine and I thanked her profusely in my mind for putting her curiosity on hold when she saw the sheer frustration on my face.

Thankfully I didn’t have to explain to Charlie yet. He was sleeping on the couch when I got home, still in uniform. I quickly made some sandwiches for both of us and left him a note saying I would be at Angela’s again before I grabbed my food and some clothes and headed back to the Cullen house.

If I was going to change again, I wanted to be away from Charlie and near the forest. There was still a computer in the house to try to figure this out and I could find some peace in Alice’s room if I needed a break. I didn’t have much time before sundown and I wanted to try to do some digging before the moon rose.

Pulling up the driveway, I felt a strange pull in my chest, like someone had tied a string around my heart. Slowing to a stop, I got out of the truck, swallowing thickly past the lump in my throat as I caught sight of a light on inside the house.

I must have turned it on this morning. Either that or I was finally losing it.

Slowly, I went to the front door and hesitated to open it. Either I was seeing things, I had left a light on or, my heart thudded painfully in my chest, someone had come home. Taking a deep breath, I finally opened the door and walked inside.

The living room was brightly lit and a small bag sat on the couch where it had obviously been thrown. The now uncovered couch. So option three it was. 

I bit my lip as I walked further inside and then forced back a sob when I breathed in and caught the scent in the air. Her scent. It was everywhere, new and inviting and so unlike the leftover shadow of her that was left in her room.

“Alice?” 

I’d barely breathed the word, the last hint of her name just leaving my mouth when I felt the wind shift and then she was there. Standing in the open front door, her eyes wide and her hands clenched at her sides in worry.

“Bella.”


	2. Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember how I said this was the opposite of a slow burn? yea that starts here

I couldn’t move, couldn’t even breathe for a moment as I watched her stand there. She was even more beautiful than I remembered. Her eyes were dark but not yet black as they tracked over me wildly, taking in the changes that I was bursting at the seems to discuss with her.

Yet I couldn’t speak. Alice breathed my name again, a gentle whisper that I wouldn’t have been able to hear before, and I broke. Taking the few strides needed to close the distance between us, I pulled Alice to me and held on tight. She was cold against my heated skin and I closed my eyes, leaning down to bury my head in her neck for a moment.

“Bella!” This time her voice was louder, surprised, as she hugged me back as tightly as she could allow. 

Then she surprised me, nudging my head away from her neck and climbing me like a tree to look me in the eyes. I caught her legs, holding her up as she placed her hands on either side of my face and looked me over almost frantically.

“Alice, I’m fine. Well, ok that’s kind of a lie, I haven’t exactly been fine for a week but physically I’m ok.”

“Bella! How can you be ok? You’re huge, you’ve grown so much in a week and that’s not a normal human thing!” Alice’s voice was tight, a mix of excitement at seeing me again and frantic worry. “Also you smell different. Kind of like what wolves smell like but still you underneath, you don’t stink like wet dog.” The last bit was whispered, confused and yet relieved.

“Yea, I really don’t know what's going on with that. I mean, I had a fever after Edward left me in the woods but then I was ok until last night.” My voice grew strained at the mention of that night, a tightness pressing behind my eyes even as I refused to cry again. Not when I had Alice with me.

“He did what?!” Alice’s voice was shrill, so loud I flinched slightly and she softened when she noticed, gently rubbing one of her hands over my ear. “I’m sorry. I was already in Alaska when Edward convinced everyone to go and he kept changing his mind so I couldn’t see anything clearly. Then I kept having to focus on Jasper because he was losing his mind over how he almost hurt you and some personal things we were discussing. I didn’t see anything until last night. You just vanished for a few moments and all of the things I saw in your future vanished, like all the decisions you’d made just ceased to exist. Trying to focus on you was intense because everything kept changing like your mind was in a tornado.”

She stopped and rubbed her temples, a flash of pain crossing her eyes and I realized just how frightened she must have been. How panicked she had to have been to have run all the way home through the day.

“Alice,” I sighed, feeling any possible anger with her melt away. I would be angry with Edward for a while and upset with the others as well but Alice, I couldn’t find it in me. “It’s not your fault. You can’t watch for everything. I won’t say he was nice about it, he basically walked me to the woods by my house and broke up with me, saying I was a plaything and he was done with me. That the family was leaving, that you didn’t need me.” My voice wavered a little and Alice hugged her arms around my neck, settling her forehead against mine. I closed my eyes and breathed her in, calming a moment later. “But he also said you were already gone with Jasper, that you’d left right after my birthday, and I had a feeling that you wouldn’t just leave me. I wrote to you, every day, hoping you’d read them and come back.”

“Oh, Bella.” Her voice was pained, her eyes closing as she held me tightly and lifted her head to kiss my temple. “I didn’t have a way to read your emails where we were but if I had seen them, I would have come the first day. I didn’t know how badly this would impact you or how horribly it would be handled by Edward, I’m sorry I wasn’t here sooner.”

“I don’t blame you, Alice. You had to help Jasper and you said youguys were working through something. I can’t always be top priority.” The reminder of Alice’s relationship stung and my reassuring smile came out strained. She seemed to notice as she kissed my nose and hopped back to the ground.

“We can discuss this more later. Right now I want to know why I have to look up to see your eyes.” Alice was back to worried now, her hands resting on my forearm. “You’re stronger too, Bella. What happened?”

“I really don’t know but, Alice, I’m not scared.” I wanted to soothe her, to calm the frantic panic that seemed to be seeping into her eyes. “Last night when it got dark, I changed into what I think was possibly a werewolf.” 

“You did what.” The words weren’t a question but simply an incredulous statement, the panic in Alice’s eyes only growing.

“It’s ok! Really, I had full control after the initial thing. I’m not sure, I just had some pain and then I was running in the woods. I came here after,” I swallowed a little, fidgeting as embarrassmnt suddenly hit me smack in the face with a harsh blush. “I was lonely and sad and I just ended up here. I slept in your bed, that’s why it probably smells like me up there.”

Alice’s eyes were soft as she moved to catch my gaze, her hand grabbing my own to drag me to the couch. She pushed me down and then sat on my lap, causing my blush to deepen and something like content to settle deep into my bones.

“Why were you sad?” She didn’t ask about the lonely, that she just seemed to understand.

“You weren’t here.” My voice was light, a whisper as I didn’t want to hurt her, but she let out a little pained breath anyway. “I finally realized why I’d always felt so lost, so not normal and why being around vampires felt more real and comfortable than anytime I’d spent around people. Then I got excited because I realized I could keep up with you now, that I wasn’t so breakable, and no one was there to learn that with me. You weren’t there to run with me.”

“Bella.” Alice’s voice was laced with pain, the kind I’d become close friends with over the last week and it surprised me to hear it. It was the pain I’d felt after realizing that I loved Alice, that I wanted Alice and needed her. “Oh my sweet Bella. I’m so sorry.”

“Alice?” My voice shook a little, my hands gripping her shoulders so I could hold her gaze. She seemed calm, a small nervous smile touching her lips as she searched my eyes. “What did you have to talk to Jasper about?”

The nervous look on her face only strengthened and I moved my hands, hugging her around the middle to try to soothe her. She smiled, that softness entering her eyes once more as she leaned into me.

“What do you know about mates, Bella? Vampire mates specifically. Did Edward ever discuss that with you?”

“No.” I was a little confused. While I knew mates were a thing and when James attacked me, they’d called me Edward’s mate, but I’d never known what exactly it all meant. Especially now, after he left things the way he had.

Alice’s eyes tracked to the doorway and she winced. Turning my head, I caught sight of the moon rising as well and a low growl rumbled in my chest, surprising both of us.

“We can discuss this later. For now, I want to see exactly what you meant.” Alice grabbed my face again, forcing me to focus on her for a moment. “I’ll be on the stairs to give you space but I won’t go farther than that, ok? Don’t worry, just remember how easy things went last night after the pain.” Then she kissed my head and was gone in a breath of wind.

I could see her waiting on the stairs, watching me like a hawk as I felt the start of the moon crawl along my skin.

It was still rising, not yet high in the sky as it had been before but this time it was the height of the full moon and I could feel the change already hitting me. The pain didn’t come, however, instead the shift was quick. I could still feel my body shifting, changing and morphing into something different, but my new size helped to keep things less intense.

After a few moments it was done and I was crouching on the floor, panting and huffing at the ruined shorts now sitting destroyed on the floor. I shook my head, enjoying the way the fur along my body shifted in the air when I caught Alice’s gaze.

Her eyes were wide, surprised, and her jaw hung open. I fidgeted a little, unsure of how to proceed and worried I may have scared her. Then she caught herself and stood, slowly coming down the stairs once more to stand in front of me. She looked even smaller like this, her hand becoming engulfed in mine as she took it and stared up into my eyes. 

“You’re still in there, huh?” Her question confused me a little but I simply nodded, crouching a little lower so my head was level with hers. “That kind of immediate control is impressive. Unprecedented, really. I’ve never heard of a child of the moon being able to be like this, especially on their first full moon. Then again, I’ve never met one.”

I huffed a laugh, moving my head forward to rub my cheek against hers and let the warmth that crashed over me as she giggled in my ear overtake my body. 

“Well, I’m here tonight. Why don’t we go for that run, hm?”

So we ran. 

I followed her, letting her scent and the soft ring of her laughter guide me through the trees. She was taking me up towards the open area they played baseball before and as soon as we broke through the treeline, Alice stopped and turned to face me.

With a bark of a laugh, I used her as my wall, tackling her to the ground and rolling so she was carefully sitting on top of my abdomen. The size difference was stark like this, her hands combing through the fur along my arms as she watched me curiously.

“So I’m not surprised at how well you’re taking this, not after you so easily adjusted to life with vampires.” Her eyes were bright, amused as she smiled down at me. “But I do wish you could talk like this, I want to know more and I hate to wait until morning.”

Then she pouted. I had Alice sitting on my stomach, petting my arms and pouting. I was suddenly very glad for the dark hue of the fur covering my cheeks, it kept her from seeing the heated flush I felt crawling along my skin. 

With a soft huff, I pressed my head to hers and then gently lifted her up, settling her to sit in the grass as I crouched down across from her. She watched me, curiosity and confusion clashing in her eyes until I nudged her forehead with my nose again.

“You want me to look ahead?” Hesitantly, I nodded, wanting her to see my decision. Wanting her to know the only thing I could think about with her here, the only thing my instincts were driving me towards with the full moon high above us.

I also just wanted to do this now while I couldn’t speak so I had no way of chickening out. 

Alice watched me a moment, her hand coming up to rub the top of my head and then she left it there as her eyes glazed. 

It felt like forever. Really only a minute or two passed but it felt like an age to me, sitting and waiting until she found what I was telling her. 

The thing I knew to be true no matter what.

She had been correct in my dreams, in the words that repeated over and over in my head. A memory of something she’d told me after I went back to school post James incident. 

I would be with them for a very long time. Just not as she thought, not as a vampire mate to Edward. No, I would be with Alice for a very long time, a a whatever I was mate to her. My heart chose her a while ago, even if I hadn’t realized it, and now with my instincts running high, my entire being was screaming at me to show her the truth.

The truth of the future I wanted, that I choose her and I will always choose her. 

Alice’s eyes cleared and she came to with a sharp gasp, moving faster than I could see as she jumped up to hug me tightly around the neck. I held her there, engulfing her in my arms as I waited a little nervously for her to speak.

“You figured it out.” Her voice was bright, happy, and playfully frustrated as it hit me that this had been what she had talked to Jasper about. “I had this whole speech prepared that Jasper worked with me on so I could explain to you how I realized you’re my mate and you beat me to it.”

I grinned as best I could and leaned in to lick her cheek, huffing a chuckle when she squealed and rubbed at the same spot.

“Bella!” I couldn’t take the scolding seriously, though, with how much she was laughing. “You really want this?” Alice has softened, pulling pack to look me in the eyes as she held my face still. “I know you can’t speak and that you’re probably running on instinct brain right now, but you really want to be with me? To be my mate?”

I could hear the unasked questions. What about Edward? Did I still have feelings for him? Would I want him back if he returned with the others instead of her?

To try to soothe her worries, I pulled her in once again, a sudden rumbling almost like a purr coming from her chest when she felt me nod against her.

Edward would always be my first love and I would always have something for him in my heart but it could never compare to what I was feeling now. This was intense, explosive, and I knew that even if Edward came back and begged for forgiveness and to take him back, I never really could.

Forgive him? Maybe, with time I could move past what he said, but I would never take him back. He felt more like Jasper and Emmett did to me now, a brother who I was still very angry with. 

The thought of the others had me missing them terribly again and a soft whine escaped my throat before I could catch it. Thankfully, Alice seemed to know what I was wishing for as she pulled back and sigh as well.

“I miss them too.” She settled in, putting her chin on her palm while she contemplated something. “We should come up with a story, why I’m back, and then in a week or two I could go try to convince them to come home. They never wanted to leave but somehow Edward convinced them so I think I could get them to come back. And yes, before you grumble about it, you can come with me if you can convince Charlie to let you go for a few days.”

Relief washed over me as she so easily included me in her plans, knowing I would want to help and to go see them all.

“First, though, we should go hunt.” I caught her eyes and saw how dark they’d become, nodding easily as my stomach roared back to life at the reminder of food. “I’ll drain and you can dispose of the body.” She giggled at her own idea and while eating a whole animal should have caused some sort of reaction, instinct overtook once more and instead all I could feel was hunger and the appeal of warm meat.

I liked that she wasn’t afraid of me, that she was so willing to immediately bring me even deeper into her world. No more waiting to the side, being kept out of things for my own good. No, now I ran with a vampire under the full moon, senses alive and focused as we honed into a group of deer.

Alice was stealthy, silent and fast, and I crawled along the treeline as best I could. We worked together, so easily melding out worlds together I wondered how I’d ever been without her before.

She jumped out to catch her prey and I followed with a jubilant howl.


	3. Dedication

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just some things to note.
> 
> Alice in this fic leans very heavily into the aesthetic of her power. she's got very witch-y aura that reflects in her choice of fashion and her decor. her room is stocked full of candles and gemstones and she has a love of tarot cards.
> 
> while they don't appear in this chapter, I'd also like to note that vampires here do have fangs but they're retractable so they're not shown all the time. I'm also going to be tweaking how the imprinting works and sorta tweak how mates work with vampires, which i'll explain in a little while.
> 
> otherwise, enjoy!! feel free to ask any questions in the comments, I love talking about this au :)

I woke the next morning with the sensation of shifting back once more, curling even closer into Alice as she laughed at my unwillingness to get up. It wasn’t until her hands started combing through my hair that I remembered that I would be naked under the blankets and a blush slashed across my cheeks immediately.

“What, may I ask, is that sudden embarrassment for?” Alice’s voice was light and teasing, her eyes amused as I looked up at her.

“Uh well, I don’t have any clothes on.” I blurted it out, straight forward was always the best way when my heart was trying to escape my chest.

“Ah. Yes, that would cause that kind of blush.” She was fully teasing me now, enjoying this, but then took pity on me and ran downstairs to get my bag. When she returned, she settled the bag on the bed and then brushed my hair back to press a kiss to my temple. “I’ll wait downstairs, we need to get you to school soon.”

That brought another groan forward. School was not exactly something I was looking forward to. I was exhausted, my body ached a little in a way I figured must mean I’d grown a little more, and I knew Alice and I needed to talk more about what our plan was now. Plus, school meant I would have to be away from her for hours and right now that didn’t feel like a good thing.

“Do I have to?” At least my voice hasn't changed anymore, though I still heard the distinct difference from a few days ago. Her answer was simply to laugh from downstairs so I took it as a yes I do, in fact, have to.

I dressed slowly, sighing as I had to rip another pair of pants to fit my legs better. Hopefully Charlie wouldn’t notice the missing pair of old jeans I’d stolen. Thankfully the hoodie I grabbed was oversized. So of course it fit perfectly now. Alice was going to hate this.

When I made my way down the stairs and into the kitchen, the face Alice made showed that she absolutely hated this look. I was surprised at how much I didn’t mind the idea of her dragging me out to shop for a new wardrobe. The way her eyes lit up as she got the idea and took on an excited mischievous expression actually brought tears to me eyes so quickly I had to look down to compose myself.

“Bella?” She’d noticed my not so subtle mood shift, immediately coming around to push me into a chair so she could tilt my face to look at her more easily. “Hey, what’s wrong? Where did you go just now?”

“You want to take me shopping, don’t you?” My voice cracked and she just looked even more confused.

“I do. You obviously need new clothes but we don’t have to go if it’s that upsetting of an idea.” Alice bit her lip and I caught onto what she was thinking. She thought I didn’t want to spend time with her when my reaction was because of the complete opposite.

“No, Alice, I want to go.” It was hard to talk with the emotional lump stuck in my throat but I needed to erase that hesitant, almost hurt confusion from her face. “When I first changed, I had that idea as well, that I’d have to replace all my clothes. It wasn’t a good thought then because, well.”

“We were gone.” The confusion cleared and Alice’s entire demeanor softened, her hands coming up to brush soothingly through my hair. “You thought I wouldn’t ever be back to do these things with you, huh?”

I hated this, how easily I broke down. I’ve always felt things intensely and now everything seemed even more heightened so when Alice’s gentle voice put things into the open air, I immediately started to really cry.

Alice jumped up with me, trusting me to catch her as she settled on my lap. I did as she expected, hugging my arms around her middle while she carefully wiped away my tears and started to hum a song until I calmed down.

“Sorry, I don’t know why that hit me so bad.” I tried to laugh past it but the sound was watery and rough. 

“No, don’t apologize.” She looked worried and I realized she was afraid I would try to box it all up, try to hide all those explosive emotions away. “It’s been the worst kind of week and you spent the whole time thinking that we all abandoned you. I suppose in a way we did but I’m here, I won’t leave again, and we’ll make sure we get the others back as well.”

“I’m not going to hide from you, Alice.” The relief on her face was clear as soon as I spoke and I felt my heart ache. “Edward hurt me, I’m not sure when I’ll really be past what he said to me and how he left, but I don’t want to push you away. I guess I’m kind of worried that I might scare you away, you know I’m not exactly the most relaxed when it comes to any feeling.”

Alice laughed, a quiet disbelieving giggle that had me smiling back in question.

“I don’t want you to ever push down your feelings around me. You’ve seen my room and you know how I can be once I have an idea. Extra is my middle name, Bella, and I want you to feel free to be as wild as you need to be with me. You’ve always let me be who I am without trying to quiet me down, why would I ever want you to keep yourself in a box.” Her eyes were bright but still slightly worried, a sadness that she couldn’t keep from away and I knew it was because she hadn’t been able to stop what Edward had done.

“I know.” And I did. She wouldn’t ever want me to be any less than I am, especially now with everything changing. “Are you sure I have to go to school?”

She heard all the real questions I left in that plea and nodded slowly, leaning forward to press a kiss to my cheek. I turned to look at her when she pulled back a little and gave her a kiss as well, a little closer than she had as I brushed the side of her mouth. 

“Bella.” The response was quiet, barely there as she gripped at my shoulders. “Don’t start, you really need to go to class and if you kiss me I won’t let you go.” 

“That’s kind of what I want.” I grinned but moved down, settling my face against her neck to nuzzle into her as she squirmed on my lap. “But I guess you’re right. I’m not sure I’m ready to try to explain everything to Charlie just yet and not going to school will complicate that.”

“I’ll pick you up as soon as you’re free. Maybe we can talk to Charlie, tell him I’m back so you have a reason not to be home again and then we can spend the night figuring things out. Well, as much as we can since there’s another moon but I’m hoping I can convince Charlie you shouldn’t go tomorrow. Tell him you couldn’t sleep or something.” Alice shrugged but I knew that she’d spend the day figuring out a way for us to have all of tonight and tomorrow together without interruptions.

It felt strange to have her basically say that we need to talk and feel excitement. I wasn’t afraid to talk things out with her because we had both already decided we’d be together, it was cemented without words, but we did need to talk about the other things.

Specifics of our relationship, what to do about the others to get them back and to figure out what exactly I had become. It was going to be a long day, having to wait for it all.

I nodded as I stood, setting her back down on the floor before I stretched. All my muscles were sore, like I’d just had the worst work out of my life. Though, I suppose, going through a rapid and huge growth spurt would do that to a person.

“You’re taller. Not by much, maybe another inch or two, but definitely taller.” I looked down to see Alice pouting as she hugged me around the waist and pressed her head into my chest.

“What’s that look for?” I bit back my laughter at the giant suffering sigh she let out and hugged her back. 

“You’re a full foot taller than me now! It’s frustrating!” The rest of her words were grumbled against my shirt, the sounds turning to a squeal when I lifted her up to look into her eyes.

“What was that last part? Even with better hearing, I still couldn’t understand it.” This was beyond amusing and from the look on her face, I knew if she could Alice would be blushing.

“I said it’s frustrating.” She pouted again when I just raised an eyebrow, waiting for the rest. “Fine! I said I like it, I always liked that you were a little taller than me and it’s still hot that you are.” Now she fidgeted and I smirked through my own blush. “But two inches taller and a full foot taller is a big difference, it’ll just take a bit to get used to.”

“So you like the fact that your possibly werewolf girlfriend is six foot two but you’re still going to grumble about it because you’re so much smaller than me now?” I asked as I set her down and her head immediately shot up, her hands gripping my forearms so I couldn’t move away.

“Say that again.” Alice’s voice was suddenly intense, though a tremble of nervous awe shot through it and shone in her eyes. I was confused until I realized just what I had said about myself and my blush intensified.

“Um I’m your possibly werewolf girlfriend? Maybe? I mean, if you want me to be?” Now it was my turn to be nervous. I shifted my weight on my feet, looking down as I bit my lip. “I know that probably seems fast since it’s only been a week but, honestly, I think I’ve known I’ve wanted to be with you for a while but I just didn’t let myself realize it. Edward leaving was sort of the catalyst for me to accept it. When he left I was angry and beyond upset but my heart really broke when I realized you were gone.”

“Bella.” She tilted my head back up with a gentle hand, a bright smile greeting me as she did so. “Of course I want you to be my girlfriend. I just wasn’t sure how quickly you wanted to move things and what you wanted to label this as just yet. I can be patient.” She caught my immediate disbelief. “I can! For you, I’d be as patient as you needed.”

“We can talk more about it tonight. If you really want me to get to school, I need to go like now if you also want me to eat.” Alice’s eyes widened and she grabbed my hand, dragging me out the door and into her car with a determined step that I couldn’t help but laugh at.

She drove me home to grab some food, watching curiously as I ate as she usually did. It was an action I didn’t know I’d missed until I caught her staring at me as I raided the fridge. 

By the time she dropped me off at school, dragging the eyes of every student to me once again, I was content and even more against the idea of leaving her for an entire day. Alice turned off the car and just watched me, amusement flickering in her eyes as I deflated a little.

“You sure I can’t convince you to drive me back home right now?” I gave her a little hopeful smile but she just shook her head slowly, reaching over to tuck my hair back behind my ear.

“Sadly, you can’t, but I’ll be here to get you in a few hours.” She hesitated for a moment and then took off her necklace, a thin steel chain that ended with a rose quartz carved into the shape of a gardenia flower. She’d explained it to me once, the meaning of positive energy and enhancing feelings of love and emotional healing. She told me how she never took it off because she was always wanting those things for everyone around her.

Quietly and slowly, possibly with the most human speed I’d ever seen her move, Alice latched the necklace around my throat, smoothing the gem down as she pulled away.

“Alice?” My voice came out a breathy whisper and she just smiled, leaning up to kiss my jaw before she nuzzled in there a moment.

“You should wear it so you can feel how I’ll always be with you. You know what it means, in general and to me, and you should know how important you are to me as well. I want you to wear it. Plus this just means I get to make a new one for myself and really, that’s gonna be fun.” She pulled back and I had to bite my lip so I wouldn’t cry again. I refused to cry in the school parking lot.

“Wait, you carved this yourself?” I ran my finger across the flower gently, unable to stop smiling at every feeling crashing into me all at once as the significance of her gesture hit me.

“Of course. I made it a long time ago, before I was even with the Cullen family. I just remember finding that specific rose quartz while searching for gemstones and having the strangest need to carve it into that exact flower.” She smiled a little, bashfully ducking her head as she caught my awed expression. “I think even then I was making it for you. It’s always meant so much to me, in ways I can’t ever describe, and from the moment I saw you, you were the same. Even before I understood my feelings towards you, I knew you were special and I could see how precious you would be.”

I would not cry in the school parking lot. I refused to cry. Instead, I gently cupped her face in my hands and leaned forward to kiss her temple and then her cheek. When Alice sighed happily and leaned forward a little, I tilted her head back and pressed a feather light kiss to her lips.

She purred, a sound that vibrated from her chest and into me as I pulled her closer for a moment. I didn’t care that anyone in the parking lot could see us in her car, I didn’t care that this would spark even more whispers in the halls. All I cared about was how Alice leaned in for another kiss, this one fuller but no less soft and chaste. 

“I have to go.” I pulled back with a growl when the warning bell rang and Alice echoed the sound even as she nodded. “You’ll pick me up right at the last bell, right?”

“Of course. I’ll see you soon.” Alice smiled, nudged me out of her car, and then she was gone with a wink and a little wave.

And just like that, I could feel the way people were watching me once again. With Alice around, I didn’t notice it as much for the moment, though I’m sure that ease would fade in time. Now, though, everything felt even more intense and I wasn’t excited to listen to another day of questions.

Still, I was determined to make it through the day and my lazer focus got me to lunch without much of a problem. 

Lunch was less fun. All eyes in the room turned to me at least once, it was harder to ignore all the gossip when I was basically in an echo chamber of my whole class, and my friends kept pushing for answers as well.

Only Angela kept turning the conversation to other topics, jumping in any time they seemed like they weren’t buying my story of a rogue growth spurt being the reason I’d missed a week of school and why I looked so different.

She could see my discomfort and kept the story off of me as much as possible. I’d have to repay her somehow because Angela was the only person keeping me from losing my mind that entire day.

By the time I saw Alice’s car waiting for me and I ran to her car, I was beyond exhausted. She watched me with a soft expression on her face, leaning over to hug me as I all but collapsed into the passenger seat before she whisked me out of the lot.

“So I have some news that will make dealing with Charlie easier but it’s not exactly good news.” Alice glanced over at me, obviously not wanting to bring this up but knowing I wouldn’t appreciate being left out of whatever this was. I sighed and sat up a little straighter, finally noticing the bags in the back seat.

“Alice, did you go shopping already?” My amusement wasn’t lost on her as she rolled her eyes.

“Of course! You have no clothes that fit and I have no food in the house. I didn’t get much, just a few things to get you through a couple days and some things so you won’t starve.” This was another moment I knew would have had Alice blushing if she could have, especially when she noticed I was chuckling.

“Thank you.” I leaned over and kissed her cheek, grinning wider when I heard that purr of hers again. “Are we going straight to your place then?”

“Yes. You left your phone there and Charlie was calling insistently so I answered.” She looked at me a little worried as my eyes widened. That must have gone well. “I told him I’d come into town again yesterday and that I’d caught up with you and you forgot your phone. Anyway, after I gave him a little bit of a story about how no one really wanted to leave but Carlisle wanted to try the city and Edward did too, he softened up a little.”

“Okay. So you told him you were back because you hate the city?” It amused me endlessly that she basically blamed part of it on Edward.

“Yep! I explained that I was going to do some research, see if we could get back into school if we moved back soon enough and then go back to try to convince Carlisle to listen to everyone when we said we want to move back. He was a little apprehensive until I said it was mostly Esme’s idea, I figured having some sort of parental approval would help, and then he was just amused and excited at the idea of having Carlisle back as the town doctor for a while.” Alice smirked, then shrugging a little. “I may have also thrown in that I was angry with Edward about everything and I was here to check in with you. That he was very happy about and he had some words to say about my dear idiot brother.”

“Oh that had to have got you some approval points, though Charlie already loves you.” I couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled up as Alice puffed out her chest proudly at this information.

“Well, anyway, I apologized for keeping your attention and he just asked me to tell you that he was going to be in and out of the house again for work. He was worried, I could hear it so clearly, so I proposed my idea that you stay with me since I wasn’t too excited about staying in the house alone. He was a little nervous at first, I think, because it would just be us but he agreed since it meant you wouldn’t be alone.” Alice pulled up to the house and shut the car off, surprising me with how quickly we arrived. I really hadn’t noticed how quickly she was driving.

I followed her inside, carrying bags along with me so she could reveal what she was up to during the day. Part of what she’d spent the past few hours doing showed itself the moment we walked inside.

The living room was restored almost completely to how it had looked before with only a few elements missing. Some of the furniture was different, Alice had obviously been quite busy, and there were more candles littering the space than before but it felt more like a home again. She led me deeper in to put the groceries away and I realized the kitchen was already partially stocked, she must have made two trips for food and cooking supplies.

“Wow, Alice, how much did you do today?” She looked up at me and grinned, dancing back over to me to take the bags from my hands so she could pull my arms around her middle.

“The house didn’t take long at all. Anything we don’t move with just tends to go into storage so I just had to bring it back out which is very simple with my speed.” The grin on her face was full of pride, obviously happy that she’d surprised me so thoroughly. “Then it was just two shopping trips for food so I didn’t look like a crazy person getting so much meat at one store. I got your clothes and the missing furniture at the mall, I didn’t go too crazy so I could get back in time.”

Chuckling softly at this little ball of energy, I pulled her closer and felt every bit of me melt as her eyes closed in contentment. I ducked my head down, bringing her in for a kiss that she happily returned. 

“We have a couple of hours before sundown,” I spoke with my lips brushing hers, not wanting to pull any farther away just yet. “And so many things to discuss.”

Alice grumbled a little, tugging me back in to close the tiny space between us, before she relinquished her tight hold. Grabbing some sandwiches and waters, she abruptly turned and dragged me back into the living room. She gently pushed me down to the couch and then sat on my lap, handing me the food after she settled in. Apparently, sitting in my lap was going to become a habit.

“Is this your new favorite seat?” I spoke after finishing one of the sandwiches in a few bites, my appetite rapidly showing itself again with the reminder of food. “Not that I mind at all.”

“Yep.” She accentuated the word with a little pop at the end, beaming as she snuggled against my chest with her head tucked into my neck. “I’ve been resisting being as tactile with you as I’d like to be since we met and now you’re even warmer than you were before, I really like it.”

Alice had always been close to me, always hugging me and walking with our arms linked, but it was true I’d noticed she would pull away quickly, as if she used to be afraid to linger for too long. I was happy she didn’t feel that way anymore, she had such an affinity for touch and I wanted her to be able to linger as long as she liked.

“Well always feel free to be as tactile as you want. I like it when you’re close to me.” We stayed there a while, until I’d finished eating and both water bottles were gone. Alice hadn’t moved an inch but I could feel her taking in deep breaths and nuzzling in a little more every so often.

“I found something while I was getting things from storage that I think might explain you.” Her voice broke the silence so suddenly I flinched. She laughed softly before pulling back just enough to grab a book from beside the couch. “I flipped through it a bit but there are a few passages that describe some rogue tribes of werewolves that were rumored to have escaped the Volturi’s mass extinction.”

“Why did they kill them all?” I shifted to lay down a little more so Alice could curl up a little easier as I flipped through the book.

“They were unstable. Most children of the moon were pretty feral after a few shifts and even more commonly, they could never change back after the first. According to the stories, packs would live in the wilds like regular wolves, only they would raid villages and farms for food and just for the thrill of the hunt, especially when the full moon would hit. They were also very good at killing vampires with their interest in ripping things apart.” She tapped my hands to let go so she could find a page with an illustration of one of them.

“That looks like what I become but it’s wilder, more animal than human.” I frowned as I pointed out the longer muzzle and hands that were more towards paws.

“Yes. The children of the moon were not like you.” She smiled and gestured to a specific passage she’d discovered earlier. “This book is a history of the old tales, meant as a sort of journal to give warning to those who dare to go against the Volturi. Not many of them exist, maybe five volumes at most. Carlisle must have kept this copy when he left Italy.”

I looked down to where she was circling a paragraph with her finger. It wasn’t much information but it was a start.

> Though the Volturi were certain they’d wiped out the last pack of the werewolves, whispers of a more civilized pack of wolves emerged. No longer calling themselves children of the moon, the term lycan was used in the hints of this possible surviving group. Though there is no proof to the validity of these worrisome tales, the possibility of these lycans having evolved to be able to hold onto their humanity while still having the curse of the moon within them is quite frightening. It would be incredibly difficult to track them down and makes the extinction of these beasts a blessing. As such things are but whispers, they’ve been discarded as a myth.

“Lycan.” I liked the term, it rolled off the tongue a lot easier than Child Of The Moon, but it still brought more questions than answers. “So apparently, it wasn’t a myth.”

“I think not.” Alice shrugged a little helplessly. “I don’t have any other information. Carlisle might know more, we can ask when we see him next, but otherwise we might just have to try the internet. Or, maybe, ask Charlie if he knows anything.”

That would go well. _Hey dad, so I turn into this giant wolf thing on the full moon, know anything about that?_ Charlie was going to flip. Either that or he would just think I’d lost my mind. He may think that either way.

“I do think that you have more control than you believe right now.” Alice’s voice brought me out of my thoughts and I tilted my head in question. “Well if this is true and that’s what you are, the control you have is even more incredible than I thought. Most cursed by the moon would shift on the full moon and either they shifted back until the next moon or they just forever stayed a werewolf, lost to the instincts and the wild nature of it all. You’re still yourself as a wolf, you follow your instincts a little more and you’re a bit more wild, but it’s still my Bella in there. Which makes me think that you could probably shift whenever you wanted outside of the full moon, once you figure out how to get control over it.”

I thought on Alice’s words for a moment, drawing absently on her back with my hand as I tried to think on how to get that control. So far it was just the moon pushing me to shift, pulling the other me out. Maybe it was just that simple.

“You may be right.” I sighed and gently moved her off of my lap so I could stand and pace, prompting a huff from her. “I wonder if it’s just that easy.”

“What do you mean?” I turned to look at Alice as she spoke with a grin.

“Well if I do have the control instead of the wolf, then what if it’s just finding the focus to call out that side of me. Like picturing myself in that form to become that form. I’m sure emotions effect it as well. I’ve been so tired lately and spent so much time blocking things out at school, I haven’t had much emotion past exhausted annoyance, but once things settle down I might have a little trouble with that. I usually have pretty good control over my emotions but I haven’t had to test that much in the past few days since all my emotional spikes have either been while shifted or spikes of good feelings since you came back.”

“Okay, so to train you to shift at will, you either have to get really angry and then calm down right after or you have to figure out the easy way to call it forward.” Alice looked thoughtful, running through different possibilities in her head. “Oh, I have an idea!” She jumped up and tapped the gem around my neck. “What if I fix the clasp on this so its magnetic. Easy to pull off or fall off in a pinch if you forget before a shift and you until you can figure it all out, you can associate it with being human.”

“So when I have it on, I’m human but associate taking it off with shifting?” It wasn’t a bad plan, really, and I could break that association once I had full control of the back and forth.

“Exactly. It’s not a permanent solution, obviously, but it’s a way to start. Or if you don’t want to test the possibility of breaking this, we could use something smaller. A ring or a bracelet so it’s easier for you to see its removal to associate it with changing.” She was excited now, rocking on her feet as she fidgeted with the necklace.

“A bracelet would be good. One that can come off easily but can go back on around my wrist while shifted. I don’t want to possibly break the necklace.” I saw the way Alice was trembling, biting her lip, and laughed at the obvious question. “Yes, Alice, you can make it.”

Her answering scream of delight was all I needed to hear to know I’d made the right call.

Alice disappeared up the stairs for a moment and then suddenly was back in front of me, taking measurements of my hand and wrist as she mumbled to herself. I simply watched her, amused and feeling so warm with affection for this tiny woman I could hardly breathe.

With my free hand, I reached up and brushed her hair back, tucking what I could behind her ear while the shorter chop fell back down into its messy place. She glanced up at me from her work, smiling in a way that intensified that warmth in my chest in a way I didn’t think possible. I wanted to watch her work for the rest of time. To see her move through life in that graceful dance she carried herself with. I watched her melt a little before me when she caught the expression on my face, her hold on her measuring tape releasing so she could reach up and pull my head down before she settled her hands on my hips.

I pressed my forehead to hers and closed my eyes, listening to that little happy purr she made in times like these. That moment seemed to last a lifetime and seemed like it ended way to quickly all at once when she moved, tilting her head up for a kiss that sent my heart thudding almost painfully against my ribs.

“I don’t know how I’ve lived so long without you, Bella Swan.” There was a heaviness to her words that swept me off my feet, a lingering meaning that left my mouth dry and my heart so full I thought it might burst.

“I don’t think I know how to live without you anymore, Alice Cullen.” My voice trembled as I returned that intensity and I watched as her eyes clouded with venom, the vampire equivalent of happy tears.

She pulled me back into a kiss that left me breathless, my knees trembling as she ran her tongue languidly along my lip, her hands gripping my hips so tightly I thought it might bruise. Alice seemed to think the same as she slid her arms around me a moment later, hugging me tightly against her as I tried to catch my breath.

“It’s almost time, we should get you ready for tonight.” Her hand traveled up to gently unclasp the necklace and I knew she meant to make sure I didn’t rip any more clothing to shreds.

“Will you run with me again?” Alice flashed me a delighted grin at my question, leaning up on her toes to whisper in my ear.

“As if I’d miss an opportunity to be with you, my Bella.”


	4. Knowing

Waking up to Alice was quickly becoming something I wanted to do every day. I’m not a morning person but having Alice wake me up with gentle kisses and her fingers running through my hair could make me more of one.

“What time is it?” My voice was rough, the deeper sound still a little jarring to me. It would take more than two days to get used to these changes.

“Just after noon. I called Charlie this morning and told him you were up so late I couldn’t wake you, he called you in sick at school. He wasn’t exactly happy about it but he seemed to understand.” Alice kissed my nose, causing my bleary eyes to cross for a moment, her answering laughter clearing the haze in my brain.

“Thanks.” I sat up slowly, clutching the blanket to my chest. “Uh where did you put those clothes you got me?”

“Everything is in the closet, right side. Take your time, I’ll go make you something to eat, we need to make a game plan for today.” She leaned in close at my confused expression, nuzzling my cheek before pressing a kiss there. “We need to speak to Charlie. Get some information, maybe explain what we can to him if he has no idea.”

“Oh.” I’d forgotten that that was on the agenda for the day. “Right.”

Alice heard my nerves and she pulled me into a soft hug. I clutched her to me for a moment, calming as her scent washed over me and then let her go.

“Okay?” She tilted her head as she slowly moved towards her door.

“I’m good. Just let me get dressed.” With a nod, she disappeared, and I was left to prepare to let Charlie know the news. To let him see me for the first time in three days.

I frowned as I remembered just how long it had been. I don’t think he’s left me alone this long since I moved here, not for work, not even when the last catastrophe hit. Pondering this, I slipped into Alice’s walk in closet and grinned.

The left side was packed with her clothes, black and red and white filling most of the space while dashes of other colors showed her willingness to branch out from her usual fashion aesthetic. The right, however, held just enough for two weeks of clothes for me. Definitely a quick trip by Alice terms of shopping. Most of the bottoms were shorts, quite a few pairs of lounge and basketball shorts I’m sure she was loathe to buy but I appreciated. The few full pairs of pants she had grabbed were loose jeans and some black pants I knew she got for something specific. The tops ranged from soft tank tops to thicker flannel shirts. It was obvious she’d tried to go for my comfort more than her need to dress me more fashionably and I was beyond thankful.

Grabbing some shorts and a muscle tank, I showered quickly and then met Alice down in the kitchen. She was grinning proudly as she presented me with enough steak and eggs to feed three of me. My stomach let me know it would all be gone quickly.

“I see my selections for you were to your liking?” She tugged on the shirt, winking up at me as her hand traveled down my bicep.

“Is that why you got so many tank tops? So you could look at my arms?” I chuckled as she shrugged, moving to sit on the chair next to me.

“Maybe. Those shorts give me a lovely view as well.” Another wink and I felt my cheeks heat with a blush. “Benefits I counted on but I actually got them because I’ve felt your temperature spike, Bella, I know you have to be a lot warmer all the time now.”

It was true, I was a lot warmer than before. I chanced a look out the windows and saw the rain drizzling down but I didn’t notice any chill in the air.

“I wonder just how much warmer. Is any of Carlisle’s medical stuff still here? In his office maybe?”

Alice blinked and then she was off, returning a few moments later with a small bag. I rifled through it, triumphantly producing a thermometer that was under a stack of bandages and gauze.

“He probably left that because he didn’t need it where they went.” I glanced up at her in confusion for a moment before I realized just what the bag was. These were supplies Carlisle kept at the house incase anything happened to me.

“Well it came in handy.” She watched me curiously as I popped the thermometer under my tongue, not so patiently waiting until the beep alerted me. “Looks like I run 103 now. If Charlie touches me, he’s going to think I not only had a freak growth spurt but that I’m also running a killer fever.”

We fell into a comfortable silence as I ate, Alice going between watching me and scanning a few books she’d found left in Carlisle’s office. So far, she hadn’t had any luck in finding more information about lycans and what this means for me. While I’m not excited about explaining this to Charlie, I’m hopeful he might have some kind of idea about all of this.

“Hey, Alice.” She stopped reading, tilting her head up at me. I’d remembered what I was trying to figure out upstairs. “Yesterday, you said the good news about Charlie letting me stay here wasn’t exactly good news, what did you mean? Does it have something to do with why he’s been working so much the past few days?”

“Oh, yes.” She sighed a little and tapped her temple. “I tried to see more once I realized how frazzled he was but everything to do with this case so far is hazy, just jumbles of decisions made that don’t make any sense at all. Then I saw a dead body, ripped up and drained. I can’t be completely sure of what’s happening but whatever case Charlie is working on, it definitely involves vampires.”

“Isn’t that strange?” I was worried, less for me but for Charlie and what this could mean. “We just dealt with James and that problem not long ago, why would there be more here now?”

“I’m not sure.” Alice deflated a little and I saw just how much not being able to latch onto a complete vision was bothering her. “I hadn’t seen anything about it until I got into town and even then, I had to focus on things through what I could gather from Charlie’s future while I scanned him for any work dangers. He’ll be fine so far as I know, by the way, he’s being very careful.”

I smiled gratefully at her, leaning in to give her a quick kiss that seemed to soothe some of her aggravation.

“We’ll keep an eye on things and then we can bring the others up to speed about it when they get back. It’ll be easier to figure things out with everyone around.” She nodded her agreement and I could see she missed them even more than I did. We’d have to make the trip to get them back soon.

The possibilities of what this danger could be kept me distracted until Alice pulled up to the house, the sight of Charlie’s cruiser sitting outside snapping me out of it. He was already here which meant I didn’t have any time to prepare for this. I had hoped to be sitting down when he got home but I would just have to hope he didn’t freak out immediately.

Standing next to Alice outside the front door made me realize just how different I was. It used to be I was just taller than Alice and was fairly thin, though Alice was always tiny even compared to me before, but now I stood a full foot taller than her and I had doubled in size muscle wise. Add in the slightly deeper gravel that now affected my voice and my spiked temperature as well, Charlie was definitely going to have some trouble with this.

“You still look like you, Bella. You’re just a little bigger.” Alice’s attempt at calming me just caused me to snort a laugh, finally opening the door to let her in.

“Lets just hope dad still thinks its me and that he believes us.” I had no idea how he would believe us but then I caught the twinkle in Alice’s eye as she showed me that she had my camera in her pocket. I closed the door behind us and peeked into the living room, relaxing immediately when I saw Charlie sleeping on the couch.

“I may have taken a few pictures of you last night. Just around the house before we left for our run. I figured having a little evidence without having to push you to change around him would be a good idea since we’re not sure how you’ll be around people when shifted just yet.” I kissed her cheek in thanks. Not having to deal with trying to shift and keep things under control in the middle of everything helped to relax me even further. “We can practice your control later, I think just having this talk with him will be enough for now.”

Taking a seat on the chair next to the couch, I pulled Alice down to sit on the arm next to me, watching Charlie for a moment as she slid her hand through my hair. Slowly, I reached over and shook his shoulder, settling back into the seat quickly as he woke up.

“Hey dad.” Anxiety creaked in my voice, making it seem a little higher than normal so at least that change wouldn’t be obvious right away. 

“Bella?” He sat up a little straighter, rubbing a hand over his face and I saw the moment he fully woke up and really saw me. His eyes widened, jaw going slightly slack as he looked me over. “Uh, Bella, are you ok? You look, I mean, what happened? I has only been three days right?”

“Yea, it’s only been three days.” My voice evened out and he choked slightly causing me to wince at the reaction. I wasn’t sure yet how he was taking this. “I’ve got something to ask you about and I need you to keep an open mind ok? Alice is here because she knows and she’s helping me out.” I hesitated a moment, looking between Alice and Charlie for a moment before I caught her supportive smile. “Also she’s here because we kind of just started dating. So she’s my girlfriend and wow I really wasn’t going to tell you that yet but, I mean, since we’re here already I may as well just get that out there.”

There was a long pause, broken only by my slightly panicked breathing and the feel of Alice’s hand gently rubbing my back. Charlie seemed frozen, processing things as they were presented to him so far, and then he just nodded.

“Okay.” His voice was cautious, like he was ready to listen but he wasn’t sure about anything. “Well, I’ve always liked Alice more than Edward so I can’t say I disapprove. It seems a bit fast but after watching you the past week and hearing what you’d yell whenever you had nightmares,” I sucked in a breath at that as Alice went stone still next to me. I hadn’t told her how bad things were for the week they were gone and Charlie had just given a slight insight I wasn’t sure I was ready to talk about yet. “I’m just happy you’re happy, Bells. Now, what exactly is goin on? How did you grow so much so quick and why do you sound like you’ve been smoking cigars non stop, huh?”

Taking a deep breath, I looked to Alice. I had no idea where to start and her patient encouraging smile helped, though I could see the curiosity there that I’d have to explain what he meant later. That didn’t worry me anymore, not with this coming first.

“Dad, I need you to tell me if there’s anything, um, weird about our family.” I watched him carefully. His brow furrowed as he leaned back into the couch and he sighed a little, the sound more exasperated than worried.

“I think you could call all of our family strange, other than my parents.” He smiled a little, looking sad as he thought of my grandparents. My grandmother died two years ago with my granddad following her a few months later. “My dad always hated when my aunt told me these old stories, family folklore she’d called it. I don’t know much about the family, really. Your grandparents always kind of kept me away from them as much as possible, something about not wanting their way of life to influence me. I just never looked to much into it.”

That didn’t surprise me much. From what I knew of my estranged family, Charlie only really interacted with my great aunt. He told me once that they went to a big family reunion one year and he’d blocked most of the experience from his memory. After that, he just decided to stick with leaving the family alone.

One thing he said caught my interest, though. Alice seemed to think the same as she leaned forward, settling a hand on me knee and squeezing gently.

“What were the stories about?” Charlie looked at me, really stared for a moment and then seemed to make a decision. 

“Wait there.” He left the room for a moment and came back with two books. One that looked old and worn while the other was very obviously a photo album. “Your great aunt gave these to me when you were born. I was supposed to pass them down when you got older, family tradition and all that, but with you living with your mom, I just always wanted to learn about you when I saw you so I just kind of forgot to ever give them to you.”

I took the books from him and bit my lip at the title on the old one.

_The History Of The Moon Cursed: The Truth Behind The Legends_

If that wasn’t enough of a hint, I found all I needed to know after I opened it to the first page and found the word lycanthropy. Handing it over to Alice with a shaky hand, I moved to look through the album. It was full of pictures of family members I’ve never known, all looking tight knit and happy. Many of the pictures were taken outside, camping deep in the woods, while some only showed pictures of the sky with a bright full moon.

“Did you read this?” Alice’s voice caused me to look up sharply, wondering the same.

“No. I’d heard enough stories from her, I didn’t need to read any more. Besides, she gave it to me right after Bella was born and then she vanished out of our lives again. I didn’t give it much thought, those have been sitting in the back of the closet for years. Though, she did try to get back into your life a few years ago, Bells, they all did. I got calls and letters from all kinds of family members I didn’t even realize I had. When they finally realized I wasn’t going to answer and that you weren’t living with me full time, they just kind of stopped. I figured if they really wanted to get to know you, they’d reach out to you specifically since your great aunt had Renee’s address.”

“Would you believe me if I told you this stuff was true?” The anxiety spike was back and I cleared my throat before continuing. “I mean, if I told you that the fever I had last week ended up being a warning that hey the full moon coming up is going to make you turn into a werewolf. Or, well, from what I can find the word lycan seems to be preferred here.” 

Alice squeezed my knee again, cutting off my rambling. I swallowed hard and looked to Charlie who looked like he was trying to decide if I had lost my mind or if he had lost his. To drive the point home, I stood and shrugged a little, awkwardly smoothing my hands over my thighs as he sputtered when he saw how tall I really was.

“Well shit.” That was a surprise. I couldn’t help the laugh that came at Charlie’s curse, falling back into the chair where Alice was still watching things unfold from her perch on the arm. “I guess I owe your crazy old aunt an apology.”

“Wait, what?” This reaction was less intense than I’d anticipated. Then I realized how he was just trying to push through this, exactly how I dealt with weird things. 

“She told me that you had, in her words, extremely high potential to continue the family line. I thought she was bein weird and I told her so, yelled at her really for lookin at you like you were gonna be this great thing for the family I didn’t even know.” Charlie sighed, deep and tired, and looked me in the eyes. “Look, Bells, I don’t know what I believe but something big obviously happened to you. You seem to be working it out and my only worry is that this could be dangerous, especially if you think about trying to reach the family.”

I hadn’t considered that, not really. The book would be enough to explain things to me. While the family could probably give me more insight and training, I didn’t know them and I wasn’t sure I could involve them. I couldn’t chance them discovering the Cullens and being a danger to them, I couldn’t chance them being a danger to Alice.

“I’m not sure if I even want to reach them, dad. The book will help and, really, you being so calm about this is more than I could have hoped for.” He smiled a little, tight and nervous and I knew he was struggling but he wanted to help. “I can prove it, if you want to really know I’m not crazy. I won’t like do anything right now and traumatize you but Alice took pictures in case we needed proof to show you.”

Now he looked even more nervous but he knew he needed to see. Alice handed the camera over after turning it on and getting to the gallery. She held her hand over the image for a moment.

“I took these while she was distracted with changing so the first one is her starting to shift, specifically of her face so you would know it’s really her. It’s a bit distorted so I don’t want to startle you. The next few are after she’d changed before we got her something to eat. She’s fine while changed, that we can see so far at least, but I figured pictures would be easier than pushing her to shift when she doesn’t have perfect control yet.” Alice turned to me and winked when she saw me sticking my tongue out at her at the teasing I heard in her voice.

Charlie just nodded, taking a breath before he nudged Alice’s hand away so he could see. I was able to somewhat see what he was looking at as well and I was glad Alice had warned him.

The first picture was slightly blurred but it was definitely my face, the ring in my eyes glowing brightly while my teeth looked too big for my mouth that was starting to stretch slightly. The next one was of my back when I’d crouched down to finish the shift, my body looking elongated, half sprouting fur and the other half darkened but just skin. Then the last three were after I’d finished, one taking in all of me, one zoomed in on my face to show eyes that were still vibrantly mine, and the last where I was standing in front of Alice with my jaw dropped open in a wolfish grin.

Moments of silence followed, Charlie’s eyes wide as he kept circling through the pictures. I tensed with each passing second while Alice looked between us to take in each expression. Then she froze, eyes glazing in a vision that only lasted a moment. When she came out of it and grinned at me, nudging my shoulder with hers, I knew Charlie was going to do what he could with this.

He would do what I do. Box it, accept it, and move on because it doesn't matter. Charlie would love me either way.

I started to relax just as he looked back up to me and I saw that I was right by the shine in his eyes.

“Alright. I can’t do much to help you with this, Bells, but it’s obvious that Alice is open to working through it with you.” He looked at her, studied her, and I could see the cop inside him working things out. Charlie might not know what Alice is but it was obvious he’d worked out she wasn’t quite human either. “I love you, kid, and I always will. This isn’t something you can stop being and I won’t make you try to stop. I just hope you’ll be careful about who knows and who sees you.”

“Don’t worry, dad. So far only you and Alice know and after that, I’ll probably only tell the rest of Alice’s family.” I knew we had to hint at them coming back, needed to start working in the idea of us going to get the others back. Plus I needed to tell him I wanted to stay with Alice for a while, though that seemed obvious now.

He came to the same conclusion. With a deep sigh, Charlie rubbed a hand over his face.

“I’m still going to worry about you, even if you’re stronger now, so I would feel better if you stayed with Alice while I was working this case.” The way he phrased it made it seem like it was his idea but I could see the exhausted resignation. He was less thrilled about me staying with a significant other for an extended period of time while I was still in high school than he was about me being a lycan.

That’s just Charlie for you.

“You need to rest, dad.” It was my turn to be worried now as I noticed the bags under Charlie’s eyes. “Don’t go back in today unless they call you in for an emergency. You’ll work better tomorrow if you sleep.”

He chuckled, nodding slowly as he stood from the couch. I did the same and he shook his head in amused exasperation at how tall I was next to him now.

“You’ve got two inches on me now, Bells.” I grinned as he hugged me, his arms squeezing me tight for a moment before he let me go. “Alright. I’ll get some rest. Just promise me you won’t reach out to the family about this without telling me first if you decide to talk to them, ok? I don’t need any more surprises.”

“I promise.” That was an easy one. I watched him start to head to his room before he paused and turned back to us.

“One more thing. Tell me when you’re going to go get the rest of your family, Alice. Whether I approve or not, I know Bella will find a way to go with you, so I’d like some warning.”

My answering blush was only enhanced by the loud peal of laughter that came from Alice as she danced over to Charlie to hug him goodbye.

“I’ll be sure to give tell you a few days before. I promise.” Alice smiled at him and then waved goodbye, dragging me back outside with her as Charlie disappeared to finally get some sleep.

I felt like I was in a daze. Charlie was okay with this, he gave me something to figure more things out about what was happening, and he had immediately accepted that I was also dating a girl and that I would not only be staying with said girl for who knows how long but that I would also be going on a trip with her soon.

Though, I’m not sure saying Charlie was okay with all of this was exactly the truth. Well, except for the Alice part. He seemed genuinely happy that I was with Alice.

I looked over to Alice as she drove us back to her place and took her in, smiling softly when she caught me staring and beamed back at me. The day wasn’t done, I knew she wanted to know about what Charlie had said and we needed to start figuring some things out but I was content to just be with her in that moment. We were a team and I was entirely grateful that she was fully on board with making sure we worked that way, she didn’t want to hide things from me that I was involved in and I didn’t want to keep things from her either.

When she parked, she turned to me and tilted her head, giving me that same patient smile she had while I figured out what to say with Charlie. I knew what it meant, she was giving me an out, giving me time to figure out what to say. If I didn’t want to, I didn’t have to explain what he’d mentioned. 

I tugged on her hand and a moment later she was in my lap, settled as best she could be in the car. She still had that smile but this time it was brighter, her eyes light with it and my heart melted. Leaning up, I kissed her, breathing in the gasp she gave as I nipped lightly at her bottom lip.

Her hands slid into my hair, holding me tightly against her. By the time she pulled back, settling her forehead against mine, I was panting and clutching her hips. Alice purred, leaning her head down to nuzzle into my neck while I hugged her tight against me.

“I had nightmares when you were gone.” My voice was a whisper, so light I almost thought I hadn’t said anything but the way Alice froze told me I had. “It was usually the same thing. We would start somewhere happy, in your room or mine or somewhere bright in the woods, and you’d tell me what you told me the day I came home from the hospital.”

“You’ll be with us for a very long time.” She breathed the words, never moving from her spot tight against my chest.

“Yea but I could never tell if it was meant to be reassuring or a warning in the dream. If you were telling me you’d come back or if you were trying to tell me you’d only be with me in my memories. Then after you’d say that, everything would disappear. I’d be left in the some pitch black place or the woods would suddenly be at night. So I’d run, screaming for you and screaming for how lonely and impossible everything felt. Charlie would wake usually wake me up because I was screaming. He never asked me why I would scream for you, not Edward, but I knew he always wanted to know.” Alice’s grip on me tightened as I maneuvered out of the car without letting her go. She shifted to hug her legs around my middle with her arms around my neck, tucking her head under my chin. 

“What else?” I tilted my head to kiss the top of Alice’s and carried her up into the dark comfort of her room. Without letting go, she pointed out where her matches were and I lit some of her favorite candles.

“Sometimes I’d hear what Edward said when he left me outside, echoing in the dark.” Settling onto her bed, I reclined back against the pillows, making sure to keep Alice curled comfortably against my chest. “Sometimes it would be the others saying them. Like it were true, that they didn’t really love me, that I wasn’t part of the family. Never you, though, no. With you it as always the same scene, the same words.”

“I would never, they would never, not want you, Bella.” Alice finally sat up, cupping my face in her hands as she kept her eyes locked on mine. “I need you to know that. Even if you didn’t want to be with me and got back with Edward, even if you never dated another Cullen ever again, I’d always love you. They’d always love you. Everyone sees you as a member of the family now, Esme and Carlisle consider you one of their children. Emmett, Jasper, and, yes, even Rosalie would be very sad to see you leave us.”

I couldn’t stop the tears that were pouring down my cheeks. They all loved me. Alice loved me and my heart ached with the intensity of the feelings rushing through me. I closed the tiny distance between us and pressed a shaky kiss to her lips.

“I don’t know how to not love you, Alice.” A low purr rumbled in her chest as I spoke. “Even if I wasn’t your mate, I’d still love you in any way I could.”

“Vampires find their mates over time, you know.” Alice smiled, tracing her fingers along my jaw as if she were memorizing me. “There’s a draw at first, a feeling of unnamed attraction. It’s why I always knew we’d be close, from the visions and beyond. Then, I thought it would be as best friends and sisters but as we spent more time together, I realized what was happening. I could see the way you and Edward moved with each other, it was how Jasper and I did. Together but not complete.”

“Would you have told me?” I lay down, pulling her to lay next to me so I could run my fingers through her hair as she spoke.

“If you had left him or he left you, yes, even if you didn’t feel the same. If you had chosen to stay with him, then no.” Surprised, I tapped her cheek to get her to continue. “I want you happy, Bella. Vampires are extremely protective and can be volatile about their mates but only after both mates have chosen. If one side of the relationship doesn’t want to be mated or doesn’t feel the bond as romantic, than the one that does will still feel protective and will still love them but the vampire side will accept any role they can take in the mates life. If you’d only wanted me as a very close sister, Bella, I would have been that for you.”

“Oh, Alice.” My heart broke for her, for the future that may have been if none of this had happened. I would always love her and I knew that if she had chosen Jasper, I would have done the same thing for her. “Even with the week I had to lead to this, I’m so very happy we had the chance to choose each other.”

We lay there, taking comfort in each other and the face that we had the chance to just be alone, until I started to doze. I woke again when Alice gentle shook my shoulder, her expression soft but excited.

“I’ve been reading.” She held up the book I got from Charlie from where she sat up against the headboard. “According to this, from what I’ve read so far, you should have complete control over your shifts except on the full moon. Unlike the werewolves of old, the wolf is in your blood and not caged like an animal in your brain, so you’ll always be you so we don’t have to worry about that.”

I sat up with a yawn, stretching and then flopping back down with my head in her lap. Alice immediately starting brushing one hand through my hair and it was my turn to purr.

“What else did you find?” 

“Not much. I didn’t get too far, I was dazzled by your sleeping face.” I blushed as Alice grinned. “I did find out that lycans have a mating bond very similar to vampires.” She said it so flippantly but I could see the buzz of excitement and nerves just under the surface. “Do you think we’re truly mates? You chose me and I chose you just as our souls did before we even realized?”

“Why, my dear Alice, I think we are.” Grabbing her hand, I brought it to my lips and kissed each of her knuckles and then her palm, watching her eyes fall closed with the affectionate touch. She purred again, louder this time, and I had to smile at the happiness that seemed to radiate from her.

“I know we have plenty to to do. Figuring your control out, planning the trip and what to say, on top of keeping an eye on the danger in the city.” She groaned and leaned down to kiss my temple. “But let’s just spend tonight just being together. We can plan in the morning.”

“Perfect.” I pulled her down for a fuller kiss, letting the sound her loud giggles and joyful excitement at a night of fun warm my entire body.


	5. Pack

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! sorry that this one is a little shorter, i'll be working on the next chapter this week and it'll probably be a bit longer.

“Focus, Bella, you can do this.” Alice’s voice came from across the room where she was working on her latest project. 

Five days after our talk with Charlie and I wasn’t any closer to fully controlling my shifts. It was getting to be incredibly frustrating but the consequence of staying with Alice until I had better control was a welcome one.

So far I’d been able to shift with emotional lows, anytime I got particularly frustrated or angry it would just start. I’d stopped it a two times, both of them happening in school. I wasn’t exactly excited to be going to school while figuring this out but Charlie didn’t want me falling too behind so Alice had re-enrolled already, forging documents that said the others would be back soon as well so that she could help keep an eye on me.

Our week so far had consisted of training at home, Alice focusing all of her mind on me at school for any possible visions of danger while I tried to keep my cool, and working out a plan to get everyone back. 

That, thankfully, should be fairly simple. Once we explained that Edward lied about me agreeing to this and that I wanted them all to come home, Alice was sure they would move back. No one had been super excited about leaving in the first place so we were pretty sure that we could get them to move back without much trouble.

My personal training was not going so smoothly. It seemed that all the control I had during the moon was only because of how exhausted I had been from the changes. Now I had to find ways to stay calm because my already intense emotions were on a tightrope, ready to fall off the edge at any moment. Good emotions didn’t push the change but they did help my control, I was able to stop any shift caused by extreme emotions if I could find a way to focus on happy thoughts or if Alice was there to help me relax.

Shifting without extreme emotions wasn’t too hard if I had something specific to focus on and was getting easier with each attempt. The difficulty was staying calm through the whole thing. It always feel like everything is heightened when shifted and so I have to retrain myself to react to any emotion in a non explosive manner.

At the moment, I was trying to shift with a clear mind. No intense emotions, no focusing on ideas that could cause me to shift like a full moon or a scenario that would make me angry. Just shifting because I want to.

It was frustrating but necessary. This kind of control and shift would be the best for me in terms of keeping calm and keeping everyone around me safe.

After another ten minutes of no progress beyond the incense Alice had lit burning itself out, I gave up with a deep sigh, flopping onto my back across the couch and throwing my arms over my eyes to block out the sunlight.

“Not today, Alice. It’s just not happening today.” I heard her making her way over to me and had to smile when she sat on my thighs, her hands bracing on my abdomen. “I am not a chair.”

“Sure you are. Besides, you like having me so close.” She leaned forward to kiss my jaw and I felt most of my aggravation melt away. “I think having Jasper around will help with your control, he can help you balance things while you work on it.”

I hummed in agreement. It would be nice to have the others back, for support and just so we could both stop missing them so much. Jasper would be meeting with us first, coming down from Alaska in two days, and then we would road trip to meet the others. We told him he didn’t have to come down just to go again but he was adamant, I think he wants to have some alone time with us to make sure I’m not upset with him and to make sure we’re both alright and happy.

“Until then, I have your bracelet finished so you can have it for school tomorrow. We can start using it as a focus point.” I let my arms fall down finally to see the pride in her work shining in her eyes. 

“So I can finally see it hm?” She’d kept it completely secret from me, wanting it to be a surprise. As she nodded excitedly in answer, I sat up and gave her a quick kiss. “Good, I want to see what you’ve made.”

At that, she hopped off of the couch and presented me with a small box when she returned. Alice settled back on my lap, waiting for me to open it. As I did, she immediately started to explain while I traced my fingers over the carved stones. She had weaved what seemed to be a mix of leather and steel with stones carved into vines and leaves, the latch being magnetic for easy wearing and removal.

“The blue and green vines are fluorite. It’s used to center your mind and ease all the chaos so you can find peace and stability. I figured it would help with how overwhelmed and stressed you get when trying to find a calm shift. Then the white leaves are moonstone which is for inner growth, it’ll help strengthen your mind and to provide an extra boost to soothing your emotions. Those purple leaves are amethyst for spiritual healing and just to cover any other needs.” She was beaming as I looked at her in awe, my fingers gently tracing the lines she’d carved.

“Alice, how did you do all of this. I’ve never seen something like this.” I settled it around my wrist, locking in the magnet latch and checking the size. It was a little big but wouldn’t fall off my hand meaning if I shifted with it on, it would be just above too tight. She’d made sure it would be comfortable but also tight enough to remind me of it when I needed it.

“It wasn’t easy. I have a small pile of chipped and broken stones on my desk. They’re still useful and will work just fine but it definitely took more than anticipated.” She shrugged a little and I chuckled as I realized that this didn’t bother her a bit as she could just use the broken ones in a different project.

“Thank you.” I leaned down to give her another kiss, her hands immediately tangling in my hair. She purred and pressed closer, forcing me against the arm of the couch so she could fully settle against me. 

“You’re quite welcome, Bella.” Alice grinned, pressing kisses along my jaw before she settled down with her head tucked into my neck. “Will you be alright for an hour or two? I need to go hunt and I’d like to do it now so I don’t have to rush before school.”

After I’d explained about the nightmares, Alice made sure I never slept alone. Not even for a simple nap, she always made sure she was either laying with me or she was at least in the same room until I woke up. It was comforting, though I’d told her she didn’t need to do that if she needed to hunt but she wouldn’t budge about it.

“Yea.” I took a breath and brushed her hair away from her face, tugging lightly at the shorter chop by her ear. “You’ll be back.”

“I’ll be back soon.” Alice smiled a little, pulling me into a hug as we went through the little ritual we’d fallen into whenever she left me alone. There were always moments where my heart would race and I’d believe she was gone again, that this wasn’t real or that she’d left, so we’d taken to doing this little exchange each time.

She gave me a wave a she left and I watched her dance away into the woods until she disappeared between the trees.

The moment she was gone, I went upstairs to settle in what had become our room over the last few days. It was still so completely Alice as she insisted I should have my own room to create my own unique space but I’d moved my new clothes and all the things I had with me stored in her room. Plus this was the only room I slept in.

As I curled up on the bed, I stared at the bracelet and tried to focus on the things Alice explained each gemstone meant. She worked so hard creating this thing to help me and I wanted to make it work, I wanted to believe in her knowledge of these things.

For two days, this is how things continued. School, focus work, and planning our upcoming trip. We’d warned Charlie that we were going to leave Saturday and hoped to be back by Monday, he was prepared to call me out of school if it took longer. That had been a surprise but his voice told me all I needed to know. He was happy that I was happy and he knew that bringing the Cullens back wasn’t just good for me, but for the town. Losing Carlisle had sucked more than I realized, apparently.

Then, Friday evening after we returned home from school, we caught sight of Jasper lounging on the front steps waiting for us. Alice had screeched excitedly, rushing from the car after she parked to tackle him into a hug. I had worried that I would feel jealous or something negative because of their past but instead, I just felt a warm joy at seeing the brother I had missed and laughed at Alice’s exuberance.

“Jasper.” I barely got the name out before his head jerked up to look at me and he gently set Alice down. I realized he was nervous, even though he should be able to sense my joy, as he came a little closer to me. “I missed you.”

“Oh.” He looked surprised and then smiled, his shoulders relaxing in a way I’d never seen when he was around me. I watched him take a deep breath and then he hugged me. It was brief but easy and I grinned at him when he pulled back. “You smell different. Less human.”

I watched the confusion flicker through his face and then the slow release of all the tension he held when I was around. Grabbing his hand, I squeezed it in support as Alice came up to us to hug into my side while beaming up at Jasper.

“Yea, uh, that’s something I’m going to have to explain.” He just nodded and tugged me toward the house. We all settled into the living room, Jasper looking so comfortable my heart ached for how much stress he had used to put on himself to be so close to me. “So I’m kind of, well,” I glanced at Alice and she nodded, giving me that supportive smile. “I’m a lycan.”

Jasper’s eyes widened and he watched me carefully for a moment, as if he were looking for lies. I just shrugged, rubbing the back of my neck nervously as I waited for any kind of reaction.

“Do you mean a child of the moon?” Alice huffed at the question and he rolled his eyes a little. “I know she wouldn’t be a normal one but, Alice, that’s all I know of when I hear anything relating to lycanthropy.”

“She’s not going to go feral, if that’s what you’re asking.” Alice had stiffened, her chest puffed up as she glared at him and I realized she was about five seconds away from growling as well.

“Whoa, Alice, relax. He didn’t mean anything bad.” I tugged her onto my lap and kissed her temple, watching Jasper out of the corner of my eye for any negative reaction. All he did was chuckle and smile at us, his eyes glittering with a soft affection that was obviously for both of us. “Don’t beat up my brother when I’ve just gotten him back.”

That made them both freeze. Alice looked up at me with wide excited eyes, a slow beaming grin sliding across her lips. It occurred to me then that they’d both been worried about how I would react about their reunion and their obvious closeness. Looking over at Jasper, I felt my eyes water when I saw how shocked he was and caught the light film of venom hazing his eyes.

“You think of me as a brother?” His voice was so rasped, so full of unbelieving awe that both Alice and I reached out to grab his hands. 

“Of course. I know we haven’t been the closest, Jasper, but you put yourself through so much pain just so you could try. You never tried to keep Alice from me even though you would either have to be near me for long periods or you’d have to deal with her coming home smelling so much like me.” I squeezed his hand and then leaned over to hug him, squishing a more than willing Alice between us for a moment. “I knew that once you could be comfortable that we’d be close, though. You were always trying to help me, both with your power and just with how you talked to me.”

If vampires could cry, he would have been then as he breathed in shaky sobs for a moment. I knew that he’d been afraid I would hate him, either for his past with Alice or with what had happened at my birthday, but I could never hate him.

“Thank you.” His voice was strained but happy and he pulled back from us to settle more comfortably on the couch again. “Now, explain this a little. Then we should leave soon, if we drive overnight we can meet with everyone earlier.”

We spent the next three hours talking. I explained what I knew to Jasper, Alice talked excitedly about what we’d been doing the past week and what we had planned. He took it all in stride, mostly being excited that I smelled more like the woods than a human so he could be closer to me than he’d ever been. Jasper kept leaning towards us, obviously used to being touchy with Alice and enjoying being able to be touchy with me now as well. It became a normality over those hours that he would have a hand on my shoulder or an arm around either of us as we talked. It was nice, I was quickly realizing that I liked being tactile with my little vampire family.

I’m sure part of that was Alice’s influence but I knew that part of it also came from the lycan side of me. Wanting a pack and then wanting to be so constantly close with that pack was part of those instincts I was getting used to. I think I may be the only lycan with a pack consisting of vampires, though.

While he brought the car around and packed some things for me away, I leaned into Alice and closed my eyes. I could feel her purr more than hear it as I tucked my head just under her chin. We were only there for a few minutes but I almost fell asleep between the soft rumble in her chest and her hands rubbing circles along my back.

“Are you ready?” Jasper’s voice broke me out of my daze but Alice didn’t let me move, instead she lifted me bridal style and danced over to his side.

We had to look ridiculous. Tiny Alice carrying her girlfriend who is twice her size but I didn’t fight it. She settled me into the back seat and then sat in the other side, letting me stretch across the seat with my head in her lap.

“You can sleep. Jasper can make the drive and we packed some food for you if you get hungry.” Alice’s voice was soft as her hands as she brushed them through my hair. “It’ll take a while to get there so just relax, we’ll have everyone back soon.”

I listened to her best I could, dozing in and out as we sped down the highways. Every time I blinked awake, I caught snippets of the conversations between Alice and Jasper.

He was happy for us, excited to have another sister in me now, and I decided that Alice and I would just have to help him find his mate as well. He deserved to be happy like we were. Then I heard her whispering about the dangers in the city, how we’d kept an eye on this for the past days but that it was difficult with everything else. She hadn’t been able to get any clear plans from them just yet, nothing more than flashes of hunts and city streets. They agreed to discuss it all with Carlisle as soon as possible.

Eventually I sat up fully, swallowing down whatever food Alice placed in my hands. I watched the streetlights slip by us and realized that the sky was starting to get lighter again already. Just how long had I slept.

“Only about an hour now.” Jasper’s voice brought me back and I nodded my thanks at his intuition about my confusion. “So what exactly are we going to be telling them then? About coming home, I mean.”

“Whatever it takes.” My voice was scratchy, exhausted, and Alice gave me a worried glance. I smiled back at her, pulling her into my side with a soft yawn. “I never wanted you guys to leave. I’m not sure what Alice told you but whatever explanation Edward gave everyone was a lie. He broke up with me in a very hurtful way and just said that you were all leaving, that you didn’t need or want a human hanging around so you would all just disappear from my life.”

A growl from the front seat caught me off guard and I reached a hand forward, squeezing Jasper’s shoulder to show him I didn’t believe it. Well, I didn’t believe it now. Alice had just burrowed even closer into my side, hugging me right around my waist.

“We didn’t hear much of their plan while we were in Alaska. Carlisle had called to say they would come fetch us when we were ready to leave but he didn’t say much beyond that. He sounded sad and I could heard Esme in the background. She sounded so upset but I didn’t push. They must have planned to come get us so we wouldn’t come back to Forks right off. I knew they had left but I didn’t realize what all happened.” He sounded so angry, I felt justified in how I’d responded in that week that they were all gone.

“We’ll bring them home, Jazz.” Alice’s voice was muffled against my shirt but she didn’t move. “They’ll listen since we’re bringing Bella with us to tell her side.”

“Yes, darlin’, I think they just might.” He looked back at us in the rear view mirror and winked at me. His smile was tight, his emotions still running wild but I was comforted by it anyways. 

We spent the rest of the drive in silence, watching the trees go by as Jasper seemed to push the car to go even faster. I took a deep breath when he pulled off and onto a side road that looked so much like the long drive in Forks and tried to keep my heart from beating through my ribs.

This led to my family, my pack. I bit my lip as he pulled up to a house tucked away down the road, watching as the front door burst open to show Esme’s surprised and delighted face.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!!
> 
> if you have any suggestions, ideas, or prompts, please comment here or message me on my tumblr lycanbella


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